I got a little weepy, OK maybe more than a little, at the surgeon's office today. Don't worry nothing has changed, all is well. He even did an ultra sound of my lympnodes to see if he might be able to see any "cancerous involvement" then he would have tried to biopsy it, but good news was he was unable to see any major nodes that might have cancer cells. Now, that is NOT a guarantee that the nodes are not involved - that is something surgery will tell for sure - but at least there was nothing hugely major there!! The rest of the appt. went well, I asked a couple of questions regarding lumpectomy verses double mastectomy and the the growth rate/aggressiveness of the tumor, shared a story and all the while he was very attentive and answered my questions. I feel very safe in his hands. And Arthur seemed to like him, too, as he was able to go with me to the appt.
I think I just got overwhelmed with..., well, everything!! Thinking of all the things that I will have to do and all the things that will be done to me!! It's a lot about which to think and a lot with which to come to grips!
I have an appt. with another oncologist tomorrow ( I had one yesterday and she was very nice and informative, but I want to cover my bases) at MD Anderson. Then Thursday I'll have an appt. with another plastic surgeon, again to see and learn as much as I can. But even with those appts. the surgeon's "scheduler" should be calling in next couple of days to schedule surgery!
Thanks to you all for your loving thoughts and well wishes - I can sense and feel them all!
in peace and love
Monique, keep us posted. It is certainly a roller coaster and the process is different for everyone. Listen to the positive stories, and disregard any others. [As you may already know] I am a survivor of cervical cancer. You are right about it being a full time job, soon it will become a monitoring job. This blog is such a great idea, I hope it gives you a good forum to share with those of use who care....you are a special person and you are certainly fighting the fight as a great warrior. You need to cry and to weep and anything else you feel. Vent, shout, scream, just keep fighting as you are....I look forward to your posts regardless of your mood. I have a good feeling about this for you, especially after the lymph node review. .... Saoirse Mishler
ReplyDeleteHi Monique,
ReplyDeleteI also know the feelings you are going through. Sometimes the schduling of the doctor's appointments will seem a bit much, but it does get better. You are indeed meeting this head-on as the fighter you are. I will celebrate 13 years, in a few months. of being cancer free. I'm not saying it won''t be "the ride of your life" that you mentioned before but if there is anything I can do for you at any time, you know how to reach me. You are now and forever in my thoughts and prayers. Love ya!
Edwina
Another survivor checks in. I hope you will continue to be honest with your feelings, because they will be up and down and everywhere in between. This is all as normal as it gets with cancer. Hang in there! You can do this!
ReplyDeleteJan
Monique,
ReplyDeleteI think of you and your family every day. Feel the positive energy coming your way +++++++++++ ++++++++++++++ (I believe in that stuff)!
Sharron
Hi friend,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing everything with us. I am learning so much. Thank you for your honesty, too. I exect no less from my friend who has always been open and honest! I love you, Monique and send positive mojo your way! :) Margaret